I Am A NUN!

I'll get to the reason why soon enough... well, the semi reason why.  Come on now people, I don't go THAT far into my personal life.  Or do I???

So today I go to look at a condo to rent from the boy toy's rents.  Ok, fiiiiiiiine, a little more respect.  The boyfriend's parents.  It's in Maryland, which I want.  It's near a mall, which is dangerous.  It's near all of my assorted boys (you heard me), which is fantastic.  And it's got hardwood floors, which is just too cool.

After he gets us lost a few times while trying to show me around the building itself (gym, pool, tennis courts, personal parking spot)... we head to the condo itself.  He opens the door.  Did I mention his grandmother currently lives there?  Yes, she's getting booted.  To the street.  I kid, I kid.  But still.  Door opens and it was a very distinct smell.  I just don't understand how all old people smell alike.  She's not in a home yet, she shouldn't smell yet.  It's like... does a certain age hit and BOOM, you reek?  She's well taken care of, has a beautiful place, so it's clearly not her amazing family being lax in caring for her.  So it's clearly an OLD thing.

So M and I are standing on the balcony (I kid you not, start with the m&m jokes now, I'm prepared) and we see these two adults/young adults playing football on the tennis courts and they weren't doing so hot, so of course we were talking smack.  Like we could do any better.  Yah, I've done well.  Then we discussed the velocity of different aged cupcakes if dropped off the balcony.  I never said we were normal...

So then I got dumped for taxes.  I'd love to say I got dumped for family time or something else normal, but no, I got dumped for taxes. Clearly, I'm not a thrilling date.  So I met a friend I met online, Mary.  Awesome, awesome, awesome girl.  I had the time of my life.  We have SO much in common.

Namely, we're nuns.  Well, modified nuns.  Our respective boy toy's are well aware of this and are even complicit in this happenstance.  We swear, but otherwise, we are the BESTEST lil girls anybody ever did see.  Wow, y'all didn't have to go and faint on me.  That really is kind of rude.  Could you please show a little more respect to a woman of the cloth???  Or a version of that...  I figured on this Easter Sunday, it was appropriate to make this correlation and to meet this new friend on this day was a sign.  Nuns who are not trying to be nuns must band together and stand tall.  Our nun-i-ness makes us special and unique and... oh who am I kidding?  We all know the truth.

Other than the fact we were called nuns... for various and assorted reasons... I'll let you think on that...