Turbulance, Jesus, and Legs, Oh My!

As I have no lions, tigers, and bears to oh my here in sunny Southern California.

Being on vacation means I have been remiss in my updating you on the exciting (or not so much) happenings in my life.

Let's start with my lovely flight on Tuesday night.  I'm comfortably seated when an older lady asks if I'll move one seat up as she's afraid to fly and wants her sister sitting next to her.  Well, I decided that I can actually be a nice human being (shocking I know) and I moved.  We took off without a glitch.  I could pause here a moment and wax poetic about the beauty of taking off over snow-covered lands... but I caught a glimpse before passing out cold, so waxing poetic would last all of three seconds.

You're thinking, "um, Mo... this really has no humor or point."  Hold your horses!  Easy flight for most of the way, until about two hours out.  I almost never get up to go to the bathroom on planes.  The opportunity presented itself, so I ambled back, get inside, when we hit a small patch of turbulance and I get tossed around like a pinball in that tiny bathroom.  That was thrilling I tell you.  I suppose I should look at the bright side that I hadn't sat down yet...

And then about 100 miles out, we hit the real turbulance.  The kind where your butt leaves the seat and people around you gasp.  And behind me I hear, in a little older lady shrill voice, "oh my God, oh my God, oh my God"... over and over and over again.  I almost cried trying so hard NOT to laugh (yes, I headed back to b-bomb-ville.)

Speaking of God, mom and I went to church Christmas Eve night.  It was a very nice little church and it was the family service, so a bunch of rather cute little kids running around in their best little outfits.  The pastor gets up to do his thing (i.e. the sermon) and goes into how Jesus was one of us.  He does this by saying, "He was born a baby... a baby who cried, a baby who pooped his diapers..."  I admit to blanking out on the rest of this because who really thinks of Jesus taking a load off at any age???  I mean, this isn't sacriligous?

And to end out this rather long storytime, a story from Christmas Day.  It was toward the end of the night when a friend messages me, telling me his mom has seen the picture of me on the log (the one on this very page.)  Apparently she said something to the effect of, "She should really learn to keep her legs shut!!!"  Aaaahhh, to be so well-known, when here I was thinking I'd been so classy in front of her.  Either that or she's being told LIES. 

And on that note ladies and gents, I am over and out.

P.S. I hope you all had joyous holiday full of love.  And if you didn't, hopefully I hit you up and regaled you with a story or two.